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Christmas One-Liner

Christmas one – liner is a good way to share a laugh or two, with your loved ones, during the
holiday season. Humor is an integral element in our life, so while celebrating any festival; lots of it is evident in different ways. It will be a good idea to ask all your guests to come to the Christmas party with their collection of the most humorous Christmas jokes. Once you have all the jokes, you can have a fun session with your friends, acquaintances and relatives sharing and exchanging those jokes.

One thing, you must consider while choosing the jokes is the type people who will be listening to it. Make sure that the Christmas jokes and one –liners do not offend any body, whether it is in terms of their race, religion, language or any others. If you have a private joke to share with your friends, do not do that in a gathering, where other people will also be present. Here is a collection of funny and witty Christmas one liners which you can share with anyone:

Top Christmas One - Liners

Q: Mum, can I please have a cat for Christmas:
A: No. You'll have turkey the same us the rest of us

Q: How do chickens dance at the Christmas party?
A: Chick to chick!

Q: Why would you invite a mushroom to a Christmas party?
A: He's a fun guy to be with

Q: Who sings "Love Me Tender" and makes Christmas toys?
A: Santa's little Elvis

Q: What does Santa like to eat?
A: A jolly roll

Q: What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
A: A cookie sheet

Q: What did the Spanish fireman call his twin sons?
A: Hose A, and Hose B

Q: How does Santa Claus take pictures?
A: With his North Pole-aroid

Q: What do elves learn in school?
A: The Elf-abet!

Q: What do you call the fear of getting stuck while sliding down a chimney?
A: Santa Claus-trophbia

Q: Where do sheep get their hair cut?
A: At the baa baa shop

Q: Which of Santa's reindeers needs to mind his manners the most?
A: "Rude"olph

Q: What can Santa give away and still keep?
A: A cold

Q: What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
A: The Christmas alphabet has NO EL

Q: Where do Santa's reindeers like to stop for lunch?
A: Deery Queen

Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missile toe

Q: How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
A: Fleece Navidad!

Q: What do you give a train driver for Christmas?
A: Platform shoes!

Q: Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?
A: He wanted to sleep like a log

Q: Why do giraffes get Christmas gifts every year?
A: They are so good that they'll stick their necks out for anyone

Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
A: Because it soots him

Q: What happened when the snowman annoyed the snow-woman?
A: She gave him the cold shoulder

Q: What do they call Santa's helpers?
A: Subordinate Clauses

Q: What do you call Santa Clause after he's fallen into a fireplace?
A: Krisp Kringle

Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish

Q: Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
A: Because every buck is dear to him

Q: What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic

Q: What reindeer has the cleanest antlers?
A: Comet

Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho

Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite

Q: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper? A: Ribbon hood

Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes

Q: What does Santa likes to eat?
A: A jolly roll

Q: What did Adam say on the day before Christmas?
A: its Christmas, Eve

Q: What did Tarzan sing at Christmas time?
A: Jungle Bells

Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem

Q: What did the big Christmas candle say to the little candle?
A: I'm going out tonight!

Q: What's red and white and red, red and white, and red and white?
A: Santa Claus rolling down a hill!

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Last Updated :- 23 December, 2011

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